As I face unemployment again, in the midst of other bad news, I am compelled once more to think about certain decisions that I've made and whether I have been too irresponsible and/or naive in my thinking. I am unemployed through no fault of my own but it is still in the back of my mind. Yes, I feel tension between responsibility and risk-taking/ spontaneity. I have never been the spontaneous type but I want to embrace risk-taking because I don't want to miss opportunities; I believe that God does not want us to live in fear but places certain passions in our heart for reasons that may not be immediately clear to us. What is the limit? Is risk-taking worth it? Am I just selfishly being idealistic because I want to believe that the world will encourage my passions/interests? These are a few of the questions that plague me. Is it just because I am a relatively "recent" college grad that I am constantly worrying about the future and finances? All that I can conclude is that I don't know. In certain aspects I feel behind when compared to some of my peers.
This passage struck me today:
"Many of us are asking, "Who can show us any good?"
Let the light of your face shine upon us, O Lord.
You have filled my heart with greater joy
than when their grain and new wine abound.
I will lie down and sleep in peace,
for you alone, O Lord,
make me dwell in safety."
Psalm 4:6-8
Monday, April 22, 2013
Thursday, April 11, 2013
GaIn & Hyung Woo- Brunch
This song is super cute! It shows a softer side of GaIn and I think that their voices complement each other so well! I imagine that this would be the most idyllic brunch date ever. =p
Gah, I can't stop listening to their duet album.
Gah, I can't stop listening to their duet album.
Tuesday, March 26, 2013
Tegan and Sara- Closer
Totally awesome song that I can't get out of my head. Yes, it is reminiscent of 80s music and I've sometimes thought that I would have fared better had I been born in that decade.
Wednesday, March 6, 2013
Psalm 51
1 Have mercy on me, O God,
according to your unfailing love;
according to your great compassion
blot out my transgressions.
2 Wash away all my iniquity
and cleanse me from my sin.
according to your unfailing love;
according to your great compassion
blot out my transgressions.
2 Wash away all my iniquity
and cleanse me from my sin.
3 For I know my transgressions,
and my sin is always before me.
4 Against you, you only, have I sinned
and done what is evil in your sight;
so you are right in your verdict
and justified when you judge.
5 Surely I was sinful at birth,
sinful from the time my mother conceived me.
6 Yet you desired faithfulness even in the womb;
you taught me wisdom in that secret place.
and my sin is always before me.
4 Against you, you only, have I sinned
and done what is evil in your sight;
so you are right in your verdict
and justified when you judge.
5 Surely I was sinful at birth,
sinful from the time my mother conceived me.
6 Yet you desired faithfulness even in the womb;
you taught me wisdom in that secret place.
7 Cleanse me with hyssop, and I will be clean;
wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.
8 Let me hear joy and gladness;
let the bones you have crushed rejoice.
9 Hide your face from my sins
and blot out all my iniquity.
wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.
8 Let me hear joy and gladness;
let the bones you have crushed rejoice.
9 Hide your face from my sins
and blot out all my iniquity.
10 Create in me a pure heart, O God,
and renew a steadfast spirit within me.
11 Do not cast me from your presence
or take your Holy Spirit from me.
12 Restore to me the joy of your salvation
and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.
and renew a steadfast spirit within me.
11 Do not cast me from your presence
or take your Holy Spirit from me.
12 Restore to me the joy of your salvation
and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.
13 Then I will teach transgressors your ways,
so that sinners will turn back to you.
14 Deliver me from the guilt of bloodshed, O God,
you who are God my Savior,
and my tongue will sing of your righteousness.
15 Open my lips, Lord,
and my mouth will declare your praise.
16 You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it;
you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings.
17 My sacrifice, O God, is[b] a broken spirit;
a broken and contrite heart
you, God, will not despise.
so that sinners will turn back to you.
14 Deliver me from the guilt of bloodshed, O God,
you who are God my Savior,
and my tongue will sing of your righteousness.
15 Open my lips, Lord,
and my mouth will declare your praise.
16 You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would bring it;
you do not take pleasure in burnt offerings.
17 My sacrifice, O God, is[b] a broken spirit;
a broken and contrite heart
you, God, will not despise.
18 May it please you to prosper Zion,
to build up the walls of Jerusalem.
19 Then you will delight in the sacrifices of the righteous,
in burnt offerings offered whole;
then bulls will be offered on your altar.
to build up the walls of Jerusalem.
19 Then you will delight in the sacrifices of the righteous,
in burnt offerings offered whole;
then bulls will be offered on your altar.
Thursday, February 21, 2013
Gem from Steinbeck's "East of Eden"
"In uncertainty I am certain that underneath their topmost layers of frailty men want to be good and want to be loved. Indeed, most of their vices are attempted shortcuts to love..We have only one story. All novels, all poetry, are built on the neverending contest in ourselves of good and evil. And it occurs to me that evil must constantly respawn, while good, while virtue is immortal. Vice has always a fresh young face, while virtue is venerable as nothing else in the world is."
-John Steinbeck
This book is the epitome of amazing. Steinbeck is able to perfectly encapsulate the emotions of the human heart.
Thursday, August 16, 2012
Reflection on Kenya trip
I am going to post my Kenya reflection because I think it would be appropriate to blog about it...
Hujambo! (“Hello” in Swahili) I recently returned from a 2 week mission trip to Kenya and it was an amazing experience. My two weeks there went by incredibly fast and I experienced so much. The word that I keep using to describe Kenya when people ask me is “amazing”, everything about Kenya was amazing. It was amazing learning about the Kenyan culture. I fell in love with the culture because all of the Kenyans were so hospitable, warm, and laid back. Their hospitality and sincerity impacted me so much more than I could ever put into words.
Bwana asifiwe! (“Praise the Lord”). Praise God for all that He is doing in Kenya. Even though our trip was short, I feel like God showed me a lot of His heart for Kenya and the spiritual need that exists there. I also believe that He was faithful to our team and answered all of our prayer requests. Since we experienced so much, I will try to give a brief description of the two ministries that we volunteered with.
ByGrace Soweto School
ByGrace primary school in Soweto, a slum area of Nairobi, is one of the schools started by Grandma Mbogo. Grandma Mbogo and her husband, Deacon Mbogo, first started an orphanage in Ngong Hills and expanded to build a few schools because they wanted to provide an education to the kids that they take in. We did VBS at this school for the first week and it was amazing interacting with the kids there. They were so full of joy and happy to have us foreigners at their school. It was so precious to see how the kids lit up when they saw the backdrop decorations, the craft materials, and the VBS songs that we brought. The kids loved dancing and were thrilled when we taught them the dance moves to the VBS songs each day during praise time, even if many of the moves were simply jumping. It was obvious that praise time was the kids’ favorite part of the day. The kids picked up the dances so quickly and had so much fun with the songs.
I loved meeting all of the kids but the second grade class particularly stuck out to me because I helped out with their class during craft time every day. One particular student that I will not forget is a girl named Scovia who always wore such a bright smile and was so happy to share with me the names that she had given her crafts. I also admired the teachers that we met at ByGrace; it was amazing seeing what they were able to do with limited resources; one could tell that they maximized all of their school supplies, such as pencils, until the very end.
During our time at ByGrace, we got the chance to visit some of the students’ families in the slums. This was an eye opening and heart-breaking experience. It was shocking to see the conditions of the slums. There is no waste management system, sewage system, or running water so everywhere you go in the slums you smell burning trash, feces, and urine in addition to stray animals like chickens. It was shocking for me to see that the same kids who lit up during VBS came from such appalling conditions. Our trek through the slums was heart wrenching but it made the struggles that these families face in the slums much more real to me. I greatly admired the faith of the Christian families that we me in the slums as they spoke of God’s goodness in the midst of their hardships; their amazing hope and faith is powerful!
“We wait in hope for the Lord; he is our help and our shield. In him our hearts rejoice, for we trust in his holy name.” Psalm 33:20-21 (one of the VBS memory verses)
“School of the Nations” International School (SoN)
School of the Nations is a private international school that was started by Missionary Im and Mrs. Im. The Ims are Korean missionaries who have been in Africa for over 28 years. This couple started this school because they saw that education is vital to bring spiritual transformation into Kenya, thus they have a vision to raise the next generation of African leaders who can positively affect the nation. They have a great vision for this school and to start similar schools in other East African countries.
Personally, it was a bit disorienting to go to from the school in Soweto to this international school because there was a stark contrast. This school was different than ByGrace Soweto because it is located in the middle class neighborhood of Westlands and serves the upper-middle class who are able to afford a private school tuition. Our VBS program at SON was more structured than it was in Soweto. I had to struggle with my feelings of inadequacy in teaching children because there were a greater number of kids and four rotations, thus I helped teach the craft four times every day. Our week at SoN had other challenges as well, such as illnesses, mosquitos, larger number of kids, etc. but we were able to pray through these difficulties as a team and depend on God to carry us through. I experienced really bad allergies at SoN but felt better once the team prayed for my healing and we were able to locate a pharmacy.
What was also precious about SoN was getting to talk with the teachers and junior leaders. There were some international teachers at SoN but a lot of them were Kenyan nationals; talking with the teachers opened my eyes to the fragile state of Kenya as the teachers (in addition to teaching me some Swahili) told me a lot about Kenyan politics and how there is a lot of anxiety about the upcoming election next year (election years are particularly unstable in Kenya). This gave me a lot of perspective of how I can keep Kenya in my heart and pray for that nation. Also, it was great to have the help of the junior leaders. These leaders were middle schoolers who, mostly, had attended our team’s VBS programs at SoN in past summers and were eager to help out more with the program this year. Having the help of the junior leaders helped the program to go smoothly and we were all excited for this partnership; it helped us feel more unified with these students. Observing the junior leaders go around with the 5 groups of kids really helped me to see the Ims’ vision coming alive. Their involvement worked out well and we hope to continue involving these older students more in future summers.
In Conclusion
I experienced so much in Kenya. I saw the beauty of Kenya, both in its people and nature, as well as the brokenness and spiritual need/poverty. God is definitely at work in Kenya and I would be hardpressed to deny his presence there. My trip to Kenya has helped me to reflect on the true treasure we have in the Gospel and its power. If anything, it affirmed for me that God is sovereign and compassionate; His compassion transcends cultural barriers. I think that the work of the missionaries there is amazing and I hope that God will give me another opportunity to go in the future to see how their ministries will grow. Please keep me in your prayers as I continue to process everything from Kenya and pray about how God wants me to move forward. Once again, thanks so much for your wonderful support! Your support means so much to me and I know it contributed to it being a victorious trip for our team!
Blessings, Grace
Teacher Martin's 2nd grade class at ByGrace Soweto
The children anxiously waiting for praise time to start at ByGrace Soweto.
Some of our team members and junior leaders celebrating a victorious VBS program at SoN!
Hujambo! (“Hello” in Swahili) I recently returned from a 2 week mission trip to Kenya and it was an amazing experience. My two weeks there went by incredibly fast and I experienced so much. The word that I keep using to describe Kenya when people ask me is “amazing”, everything about Kenya was amazing. It was amazing learning about the Kenyan culture. I fell in love with the culture because all of the Kenyans were so hospitable, warm, and laid back. Their hospitality and sincerity impacted me so much more than I could ever put into words.
Bwana asifiwe! (“Praise the Lord”). Praise God for all that He is doing in Kenya. Even though our trip was short, I feel like God showed me a lot of His heart for Kenya and the spiritual need that exists there. I also believe that He was faithful to our team and answered all of our prayer requests. Since we experienced so much, I will try to give a brief description of the two ministries that we volunteered with.
ByGrace Soweto School
ByGrace primary school in Soweto, a slum area of Nairobi, is one of the schools started by Grandma Mbogo. Grandma Mbogo and her husband, Deacon Mbogo, first started an orphanage in Ngong Hills and expanded to build a few schools because they wanted to provide an education to the kids that they take in. We did VBS at this school for the first week and it was amazing interacting with the kids there. They were so full of joy and happy to have us foreigners at their school. It was so precious to see how the kids lit up when they saw the backdrop decorations, the craft materials, and the VBS songs that we brought. The kids loved dancing and were thrilled when we taught them the dance moves to the VBS songs each day during praise time, even if many of the moves were simply jumping. It was obvious that praise time was the kids’ favorite part of the day. The kids picked up the dances so quickly and had so much fun with the songs.
I loved meeting all of the kids but the second grade class particularly stuck out to me because I helped out with their class during craft time every day. One particular student that I will not forget is a girl named Scovia who always wore such a bright smile and was so happy to share with me the names that she had given her crafts. I also admired the teachers that we met at ByGrace; it was amazing seeing what they were able to do with limited resources; one could tell that they maximized all of their school supplies, such as pencils, until the very end.
During our time at ByGrace, we got the chance to visit some of the students’ families in the slums. This was an eye opening and heart-breaking experience. It was shocking to see the conditions of the slums. There is no waste management system, sewage system, or running water so everywhere you go in the slums you smell burning trash, feces, and urine in addition to stray animals like chickens. It was shocking for me to see that the same kids who lit up during VBS came from such appalling conditions. Our trek through the slums was heart wrenching but it made the struggles that these families face in the slums much more real to me. I greatly admired the faith of the Christian families that we me in the slums as they spoke of God’s goodness in the midst of their hardships; their amazing hope and faith is powerful!
“We wait in hope for the Lord; he is our help and our shield. In him our hearts rejoice, for we trust in his holy name.” Psalm 33:20-21 (one of the VBS memory verses)
“School of the Nations” International School (SoN)
School of the Nations is a private international school that was started by Missionary Im and Mrs. Im. The Ims are Korean missionaries who have been in Africa for over 28 years. This couple started this school because they saw that education is vital to bring spiritual transformation into Kenya, thus they have a vision to raise the next generation of African leaders who can positively affect the nation. They have a great vision for this school and to start similar schools in other East African countries.
Personally, it was a bit disorienting to go to from the school in Soweto to this international school because there was a stark contrast. This school was different than ByGrace Soweto because it is located in the middle class neighborhood of Westlands and serves the upper-middle class who are able to afford a private school tuition. Our VBS program at SON was more structured than it was in Soweto. I had to struggle with my feelings of inadequacy in teaching children because there were a greater number of kids and four rotations, thus I helped teach the craft four times every day. Our week at SoN had other challenges as well, such as illnesses, mosquitos, larger number of kids, etc. but we were able to pray through these difficulties as a team and depend on God to carry us through. I experienced really bad allergies at SoN but felt better once the team prayed for my healing and we were able to locate a pharmacy.
What was also precious about SoN was getting to talk with the teachers and junior leaders. There were some international teachers at SoN but a lot of them were Kenyan nationals; talking with the teachers opened my eyes to the fragile state of Kenya as the teachers (in addition to teaching me some Swahili) told me a lot about Kenyan politics and how there is a lot of anxiety about the upcoming election next year (election years are particularly unstable in Kenya). This gave me a lot of perspective of how I can keep Kenya in my heart and pray for that nation. Also, it was great to have the help of the junior leaders. These leaders were middle schoolers who, mostly, had attended our team’s VBS programs at SoN in past summers and were eager to help out more with the program this year. Having the help of the junior leaders helped the program to go smoothly and we were all excited for this partnership; it helped us feel more unified with these students. Observing the junior leaders go around with the 5 groups of kids really helped me to see the Ims’ vision coming alive. Their involvement worked out well and we hope to continue involving these older students more in future summers.
In Conclusion
I experienced so much in Kenya. I saw the beauty of Kenya, both in its people and nature, as well as the brokenness and spiritual need/poverty. God is definitely at work in Kenya and I would be hardpressed to deny his presence there. My trip to Kenya has helped me to reflect on the true treasure we have in the Gospel and its power. If anything, it affirmed for me that God is sovereign and compassionate; His compassion transcends cultural barriers. I think that the work of the missionaries there is amazing and I hope that God will give me another opportunity to go in the future to see how their ministries will grow. Please keep me in your prayers as I continue to process everything from Kenya and pray about how God wants me to move forward. Once again, thanks so much for your wonderful support! Your support means so much to me and I know it contributed to it being a victorious trip for our team!
Blessings, Grace
Teacher Martin's 2nd grade class at ByGrace Soweto
The children anxiously waiting for praise time to start at ByGrace Soweto.
Some of our team members and junior leaders celebrating a victorious VBS program at SoN!
Tuesday, June 19, 2012
Its been a while
Wow, I cannot believe how long it has been since I last updated this blog. Its been a year and a half! Unbelievable! Lately, I've been itching to blog. It is impossible to perfectly encapsulate all that has happened in the past year and a half. Post-grad life definitely has its ups and downs. It has been an adventure church-hopping, going through the tedious job search (and getting used to rejection), adjusting to a full time office job, etc. There are a lot of transitions and projects going on at work but I'm trying to take everything in stride.
It has been a challenging transition into post grad life but I'm grateful that God has been teaching me a lot, providing awesome people in my life, and for always reminding me that I'm not alone. I may not be too happy with my job and not certain if I'm making the right career choice (by pursuing graduate school), but I'm trying to learn to take things day by day and trust God that he is leading me where he wants me to be. My big focus needs to be how I am relating with God and allowing that relationship to shape me.
I can't wait to see what God has in store for me as I adjust to Oakland..and also for my trip to Kenya!!
I love my Convergence family and for my friends for showing me that working life doesn't have to be all bad or dreary, haha. =)
It has been a challenging transition into post grad life but I'm grateful that God has been teaching me a lot, providing awesome people in my life, and for always reminding me that I'm not alone. I may not be too happy with my job and not certain if I'm making the right career choice (by pursuing graduate school), but I'm trying to learn to take things day by day and trust God that he is leading me where he wants me to be. My big focus needs to be how I am relating with God and allowing that relationship to shape me.
I can't wait to see what God has in store for me as I adjust to Oakland..and also for my trip to Kenya!!
I love my Convergence family and for my friends for showing me that working life doesn't have to be all bad or dreary, haha. =)
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)